Diana Trout

Wait on You

Photo by Wojciech Święch on Unsplash

I stood still beside the window looking out on a misty morning, darkness fading as day came with conquering light, slowly yet confidently bathing the fields with exposure to beauty and knowledge. I didn’t know this new land. I had only driven through, spent little time in this city that we have now lived in for 7 cumulative years, having moved away and back again. Yet that first morning I awoke in this place was beautiful. It was filled with wonder and a holy fear. Where is this road taking us?

We were staying in a guest suite and I was having early labor pains. We had been to the hospital the morning before to make sure it was alright to travel across the mountains to the Yakima valley. It was too early to go into labor, I was not even 30 weeks along and yet the contractions were regular and constant. The doctor at the hospital monitored the baby and gave me some medicine to slow the contractions. Thankfully, it worked. My baby was safe.

We packed up our two toddlers and made the trek across the mountain pass. We were scheduled to meet with a church for my husband to candidate for the worship pastor job. I had mapped out every hospital along the route just in case the rumblings turned into full on labor.

On that morning of awaking to a blue pink misty field, I didn’t know how I felt about this place of unknowns. The gentle mist rising in an unknown land, a place and people that was foreign to me, and the question of whether we would raise our precious ones here. Would I trust the Lord with His shepherding love? Would I trust that the Lord would hold our family the way I was holding my pregnant belly, protecting the beloved  child growing inside?

Fast forward to this summer…

I’m always looking for new music, a new soundtrack to add to my personal life collection. I was telling some ladies recently, that while growing up, I was heavily into the CCM music scene. I knew every song by all the big name Christian artists and bands. There were few artists that I admit I didn’t know, but the ones I did, I listened to their music on repeat. Their song lyrics filled my days, and I memorized every lilt and stylistic overtone. I studied the cassette tape and cd jackets, enjoyed every photo and design element, and even took note of who played which instrument, who wrote the songs, who sang BGV’s, which instruments were used, and where the recording studio was located. These were important details, and I studied them like a kid studies baseball cards.

But not so today. Life is full and priorities have changed over the decades. Although, when I notice that an artist I appreciate has teamed up with an artist I’ve never heard of, I take notice of that. That is how I discovered Hillside Recording. I was listening to Tenielle Neda’s rendition of Yet Not I But Through Christ in Me, and saw that she had partnered with another band. Curious, I clicked over to their music and discovered new music to enjoy.

The cover art for the song, Wait on You, is a photograph of a field at dawn. I am drawn into this peaceful scene of a misty morning in the country, awaking to birdsong, and absolute quiet, a picture of serenity and peace, of the hope of a new day and new mercies from the Lord, of entering a day seemingly untouched by the brokeness of the world.

This photograph and song led me into two memories of awaking to a misty morning. The second memory is as a teenager at summer camp serving as a camp counselor at a Christian ranch in British Columbia. At early morning before dawn, I dressed and stepped outside of the cabin. Taking the road, I walked toward the fence with every crunch of gravel under my hiking boots. A baby calf stood nearby in the dew drenched grass, a fog covering everything, and a silence so peaceful. I longed to know Jesus more, to experience his presence and wait for him. Perhaps that is why a morning alone and in quiet is so precious to me. I want to sit at the feet of Jesus and wait on him with wonder and a holy fear, with a trust in the One who said, “Be still and know that I am God.”

I hope you too enjoy this song and learn to wait in expectation of the One who does more than we can ask or imagine.

In the stillness before dawn breaks
Steady my heart and mind as long as it takes
My God I've never seen far
Just keep my eyes on places You are
In every season I will wait
I will lean into Your strength
You will fight my battles I need only to be still

Wait on You, Song by Diana Trout and Hillside Recording